“If Not Us, Then Who? If Not Now, Then When?”
These were the guiding priniciples of the founders of Small Steps Foundation to take a collective action, our first step to make a positive difference in the lives of millions of helpless children who are deprived of their basic universal human right: Right to Education.

To learn more about the work they are supporting please visit http://projects.smallstepsfoundation.org/

SSF Walk is one of the 2 major fund-raising event that the organization hosts every year. If you live in Northern California, I encourage you to be a part of the walk and help raise funds. You can also support a team of your choice by making a donation of any amount at the Small Steps teams at firstgiving.com

This is the team I support:

http://www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/reetuguptaandnitinkumar-kumar/small-step-walk-2011

Gaurav Tandon is a 34 year old professional in Mumbai, India living with his wife and their 6 year old son. Gaurav has AML, a type of Blood Cancer, and needs a Non-Related Allogenic transplant. Since such transplants are rarely performed in India, there is a high chance that it would have to be done in Singapore, UK or the USA.

The estimated cost of the treatment in Singapore and UK is around 1.5 Crore Indian Rupees (around US$ 333,000), whereas in the US is around of 2 Crore Indian Rupees (around US$ 444,000).

Posted using ShareThis

When I don’t do it,
I am lazy,
When my boss does not do it,
he is busy,

When I do something without being told,
I am trying to be smart,
When my boss does the same,
he takes the initiative,

When I please my boss,
I am apple polishing,
When my boss pleases his boss,
he is cooperating,

When I make a mistake,
you’re an idiot.
When my boss makes a mistake,
he’s only human.

When I am out of the office,
I am wandering around.
When my boss is out of the office,
he’s on business.

When I am on a day off sick,
I am always sick.
When my boss is a day off sick,
he must be very ill.

When I apply for leave,
I must be going for an Interview
When my boss applies for leave,
It’s because he’s Overworked

When I do good,
my boss never remembers,
When I do wrong,
he never forgets

2. There is light at the end of the tunnel for India , but it’s that of an incoming train which will run them over.

3. Experience is like a comb that life gives you when you are bald.

4. This quote was made after Ganguly called Dravid for a run and midway sent him back and Dravid was run out in the third test against the West Indies at Barbados.”Ganguly has thrown a drowning man both ends of the rope.”

5. Sri Lankan score is running like an Indian taximeter.

6. Statistics are like miniskirts, they reveal more than what they hide.

7. Wickets are like wives – you never know which way they will turn!

8. He is like Indian three-wheeler, which will suck a lot of diesel but cannot go beyond 30!

9. The Indians are going to beat the Kiwis! Let me tell you, my friend that the Kiwi is the only bird in the whole world, which does not have wings!

10. As uncomfortable as a bum on a porcupine.

11. The ball whizzes past like a bumble -bee and the Indians are in the sea.

12. The Indians are finding the gaps like a pin a haystack.

13. The pitch is as dead as a dodo.

14. Deep Dasgupta is as confused as a child is in a topless bar!

15. The way Indian wickets are falling reminds of the cycle stand at Rajendra Talkies in Patiala one falls and everything else falls!

16. Indian team without Sachin is like giving Kiss without a Squeeze.

17. You cannot make Omelets without breaking the eggs.

18. Deep Dasgupta is not a Wicket Keeper, he is a goalkeeper. He must be given a free transfer to Manchester United.

19. He will fight a rattlesnake and give it the first two bites too.

20. One, who doesn’t throw the dice, can never expect to score a six.

X: Which shaving cream do you use?
Y: Baba’s

X: Which aftershave do you use?
Y: Baba’s

X: Which deodorant do you use?
Y: Baba’s

X: Which toothpaste do you use?
Y: Baba’s

X: Which shampoo do you use?
Y: Baba’s

X: Which socks do you use?
Y: Baba’s

X (Frustrated): Okay, tell me, what is this Baba? Is it an international company???
Y: No, He is my roommate

The brain said, “I do all the thinking so I’m the most important and I should be in charge.”

The eyes said, “I see everything and let the rest of you know where we are, so I’m the most important and I should be in charge.”

The hands said, “Without me we wouldn’t be able to pick anything up or move anything. So I’m the most important and I should be in charge.”

The stomach said, “I turn the food we eat into energy for the rest of you. Without me, we’d starve. So I’m the most important and I should be in charge.”

The legs said, “Without me we wouldn’t be able to move anywhere. So I’m the most important and I should be in charge.”

Then the rectum said, “I think I should be in charge.”
All the rest of the parts said, “YOU?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You don’t do anything! You’re not as important as we surely are! You can’t be in charge.” So the rectum closed up.

After a few days, the legs were all wobbly, the stomach was all queasy, the hands were all shaky, the eyes were all watery, and the brain was all cloudy.
They all agreed that they couldn’t take any more of this shit and agreed to put the rectum in charge.

The moral of the story? You don’t have to be the most important to be in charge..you Just have to be an Asshole.

2- Then send 2 or 3 candidates in the room and close the door.

3- Leave them alone and come back after 6 hours and then analyze the situation.

Now, watch this

If they are counting the bricks…Put them in the accounts department.

If they are recounting them…Put them in auditing.

If they have messed up the whole place with the bricks…Put them in engineering.

If they are arranging the bricks in some strange order…Put them in planning.

If they are throwing the bricks at each other…Put them in operations.

If they are sleeping…Put them in security.

If they have broken the bricks into pieces…Put them in information technology.

If they are sitting idle…Put them in human resources.

If they say they have tried different combinations, yet not a brick has
been moved…Put them in sales.

If they have already left for the day…Put them in marketing.

If they are staring out of the window…Put them on strategic planning.

And then last but not least.

If they are talking to each other and not a single brick has been moved.

Congratulate them and put them in Top management

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0.

I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child-processes that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activities.

Applications such as BachelorNights 10.3, Cricket 5.0, BeerWithBuddies 7.5, and Outings 3.6 no longer runs, crashing the system whenever selected. I can’t seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications.

I’m thinking about going back to Girlfriend 5.0 , but the ‘uninstall’ doesn’t work on Wife 1.0.

Please help!

Thanks,
“A Troubled User”

#### REPLY:

Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that people complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program.Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!!

It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 5.0.

It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 5.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed not to allow this. (Look in your Wife 1.0 Manual underWarnings-Alimony-Child Support) .

I recommend that you keep Wife1.0 and work on improving the environment.

I suggest installing the background application “Yes Dear ” to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean 2.5, Sweep 3.0, Cook 1.5 and DoLaundry 4.2. However, be very careful how you use these programs.

Improper use will cause the system to launch the program NagNag 9.5 .

Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Sarees 2.1 and Jewellery 5.0

STATUTORY WARNING : DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system